do you think we will always be faced with the same opposition? that we will be forever plagued with those things that haunt us now? i have the feeling that we will. the same problems that we face right now we will be faced with in 30 years. i suppose if we correct those problems they won't be as noticeable then, if at all. sometimes i feel myself stumble into my eternal rut and wonder how i am ever going to get out of it. and when i do get out i wonder how i will ever stray far enough away from the rut to never fall in again. and that's really all i want. to be able to be far enough away from it so that i may be as happy as i know how to be. and that is really what i want. to be happy and to have good friends and to sit around and share my life with them. that is what i truly want. to live a life full of happiness and love with people i trust and admire. and this is only possible if we stay away from the problems that hold us down. but that is not to say that in those hard times we cannot experience a certain amount of happiness. we will just not be able to experience the full amount we are capable of. and how damning is that. to know how to be happy but not to do those things in order to be that way. and i suppose passing through half-happy isn't to bad. it's fun and gives you what you want. but why not be strong enough to fight off our problems and be our bests. to live life with satisfaction, to live it with love.

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