in relationships it seems that guys are always the uncontrollable ones. they are the ones that oft times will ruin the relationship with their selfishness and non-commital actions.

i know that this is not always the case. there are good guys out there. and i know that girls can be the same way (selfish etc). but lately i have been hearing so many stories where the guy is such a doof and not giving what the girl really needs and deserves. i feel that i fit into this category somewhat.

me and a friend were talking loosely about this last month and she mentioned that what guys really need are girls to help them be better people. that guys will be like this (uncontrollable) untill a girl comes along and helps them become the person the could and should be. this is coming out kinda funny but i hope you understand the point of it. while at the time i agreed with what she said greatly, i am starting to wonder if that is true. people's core are essentially never going to change. i look at old people that still have problems that seem so basic to control (anger, greed etc.) i think "they have had 50 years to fix this and are still struggling." so even if i find the woman of my dreams, someone who will help me to be a better person and who i will want to be a better person for, will not my deep desires remain the same? will not my core remain solid? i know that if i work day by day on the things that i don't like, that if i make them better, then i can eventually be better. but how to change oneself if one does not want to be changed? or if one is happy where they are, or think that they are happy, how do you show them that what they are doing is not (to you) true happiness?

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