my mother just called to tell me that a friend of mine from high school just died. he was found in his room alone by the landlord.

i am hardly affected by this news. i do not think that makes me very cruel or heartless. when we were in high school we were okay friends, and i have not seen him in 7 sevens. i would be a lot more effected if someone died that i currently spoke with.

the most depressing thing about all of this is him dying alone. and what makes it even more depressing is the life that he was living. he went on a mission to spokane washington, and returned back to the same small town he had left from (altus, oklahoma). he lived with his parents for a little bit, but eventually got a place of his own-a basement underneath a lady. he was working a full time job and i assume (though this is just an assumption) that he did not have many friends. i assume that because he did not have many in high school, and was a pretty insecure and weird kid, though nice. my mom told me that apparently he was not going to church (her biggest passion).

i then thought if i died in my room alone, not only would it be traumatic to my mom that she lost a son, but devastating to also learn that he had not been going to church (or for that matter no longer a full believer).

i talked to my mom for 11 minutes, and it seriously was the hardest thing in the world!

at one point she asked

"are you going to family home evening?"

i told her, "i am not."

she asked, "why?"

i then told her that i didn't have any simliarities with the people that went. after this topic she told me she wished i was dating some girl in provo. come on now mom!!!!!!!!!! i love you but come on now!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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