people will sometimes tell me "i have been listening to so and so's album a lot lately." and every time they say this i wish that i was able to say the same thing. not necessarily about the same album, but that i could say "i have been listening to so and so's album a lot lately." it always seems so romanticized and beautiful. and even when someone will say that about an album that i too have been listening to, i still have this longing for something, i am not sure what. maybe it is the memories i know they are creating while listening to that album, and i wish to have them as well (even though i have my own). maybe im wishing that i shared those memories with them. some of the most powerful albums that i have enjoyed have been those where i listened to it while dating someone, where we listened to it together, and so the memory of the music is directly tied to the memory of the relationship. what made me think of this is that alison was telling me albums she had been listening to a lot lately. the only two i remember where the mountain goats and neko case.

i am tired of everything seeming better then it really is. and if something is better then it really is, it seems to rarely last. i am also tired of being tired of thinking these things. what happened to the days of youthful romance? of sloppy kisses and ignorant love?

i am still (somewhat) optimistic.

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