something that has been difficult about people knowing that i drink and (occasionally) get high is that now those people assume i am always like that, even if i am not. for example, i feel i have always written really weird myspace comments. but now if somebody sees a weird myspace comment i wrote at 4 in the morning, they will probably assume that i was drunk or high when i wrote it. and while that might be the case, it often times is not. maybe 6 months ago it would have been accurate, but now learning how to moderate things that were once so hard to moderate, it probably isn't (though it could be).

sometimes i hate the forum of diaryland, in that i am writing about myself in a public space for all to read, and that they will take from what i write different opinions of who i am. sometimes i think it would be better to never talk to anyone ever again (though i know how important talking with people can be). i think i am learning when to say what, and to whom i say things to. then again, last night i was saying everything to anyone.

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