my mother's cry
2004-12-24, 2:57 a.m.

last night i watched the movie traffic. it is about the war on drugs between the US and Mexico. tonight i watched training day. another one about the war on drugs, this time from the perspective of police.

both of these movies i found to be entertaining. i watched both of them from about 1-3 in the morning on each night.

while i found that they were entertaining, they both did very little to uplift me. i have never been one to complain about movies that are violent or ones that are ridden with profanity. these movies never seem to bother me. and while these movies, traffic and training day, had a lot of violence and curse words, they did not bother me. but they seemed to bother me in that i left each movie unsatisfied.

i do not feel that either movie particularly uplifted me to become a better person. and this is the first time that i think i have felt this way. or at least that i realize i am feeling this way.

it makes me want to see movies that are inspiring. and not necessarily uplifting, moreso movies that move me.

take a movie like mystic river. that movie was depressing and draining, but it moved me. maybe that is because it dealt with real emotions like the love of a family and how it would feel to lose a loved one.

and both traffic and training day did little in that regard. they failed to tap into my being and have me feel certain emotions. maybe that is because i have had little to do with the war on drugs, besides the five times i smoked marijuana in high school

on a simliar note, my mom told me that if i gave up R rated movies for a year, she would give up general hospital for a year.

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